‘I lost my mum and grandma to cancer within months, aged six – they’ll be watching proudly as their charity continues’
Amy Leslie said her mother Danielle Leslie and grandmother Sylvie Henry died within months of each other.
A young woman who lost her mother and grandmother to breast cancer within months, aged six, has said they will be “watching extremely proudly” as their legacy is continued through their charity.
Amy Leslie, 22, a recently qualified primary teacher who lives in north London, lost her mother Danielle Leslie, aged 40, and grandmother Sylvie Henry, aged 62, to breast cancer within months between 2009 and 2010.
Before they died, the duo, who were professional dancers and ran their own dance school, decided to launch a charity around the kitchen table with just £100 – and Danielle even left Amy and her brothers memory boxes with letters and gifts for important milestones.
While Amy did not fully understand the impacts of their deaths until she was older, she said her involvement in the charity, called Future Dreams, has helped her feel close to them, and it has since gone from strength to strength.
Now, as she travels the world, Amy hopes her mother and grandmother will be “proud” of her and she wants to continue sharing their message that no-one should experience breast cancer “alone or without hope”.
“They were lucky, in a way,” Amy told PA Real Life.
“You’re going through the hardest thing ever – and not only do you have someone with you, but you have your mother or your daughter with you.
“With the charity, we’re always trying to recreate the message: ‘Don’t go through it alone or without hope’.
“I think they are watching extremely proudly as the charity is achieving what they wanted.”
Amy said Danielle and Sylvie were “opposites”, but they were “incredibly close” and loved collaborating together.
She described her mother as “beautiful, funny and easy-going” and her grandmother as “incredibly strong, family-orientated and a leader”.
While she finds it difficult to recall specific memories from her childhood, she said she watches home videos all the time and is “always ready for non-stop stories about them”.
“I find it hard to think of memories of them,” Amy explained.
“But the home videos are the best thing ever for me… I literally watch them non-stop.”
Amy believes her grandmother was first diagnosed with breast cancer before she was born, and her mother was diagnosed when she was one.
She said they both reached remission, but the cancer returned – and this prompted the duo to launch a charity around the family kitchen table with just £100 in 2008.
“I just remember Future Dreams existing for as long as I can remember,” Amy said.
“Cancer and breast cancer are just words that have always been in my vocabulary.
“I think I knew what was going on, but I obviously didn’t understand what it all meant and the extent of it, and then I knew something had massively shifted.”
Amy remembers her mother losing her hair and feeling “confused” by the changes in her appearance.
However, she said she would dress up and wear “funny hats” to “shield” Amy and her older brothers, Ben and Joe, from the impacts of her treatments.
Danielle and Sylvie even put on dance shows to raise money for Future Dreams, with one being hosted at the Savoy hotel in London, and Amy said this meant cancer was never “scary” to her when she was younger.
“There were costumes and all these shows and pink ribbons everywhere,” Amy said.
“It was almost like the scariness of breast cancer became this fun, amazing charity.”
Amy said Sylvie died in July 2009, followed by Danielle in September 2010, when she was just six years old.
Since Amy was young, she said she did not experience the full impacts of grief until years later, but she knew she was “different” from her peers, and she would sometimes feel jealous of her friends with their mothers.
“Being young, I don’t think you fully process what that means for you and what’s going on, but I remember knowing my mum was gone, not coming back, and just living with that,” she said.
“When I got older and actually understood what they went through, I just thought, ‘Oh my God, that is terrible, and it was at the same time as each other’.
“As your brain matures, you start to really process what actually happened.”
At university, the first time being away from home, Amy said the impacts felt greater and she started learning more about breast cancer.
She started feeling “angry of the situation” and, while seeing a therapist helped, she said grief has been challenging and it “comes up in the weirdest ways”.
“Sometimes I think, ‘I was six, she knew a six-year-old me. What would she think of me today and who I am?’,” Amy said.
“I guess as you get older, there are bigger milestones – I had my graduation and now I have my first serious relationship, and I’m going travelling.
“You just realise there are more things that person is missing.”
Amy decided she wanted to “throw (herself) into being part of the charity” as this helps her feel close to her mother and grandmother, and she wants to continue their legacy.
From that initial kitchen-table idea, Future Dreams has since gone on to open Future Dreams House, which is decorated pink and marked its fifth anniversary in September.
The house provides practical, emotional and psychological support to people affected by breast cancer, with people travelling from across the UK to access its services.
“I feel so connected to the charity and I feel like it’s my way to always have something with them,” Amy said.
“The house is like a hug from my mum and my grandma – they’re hugging you when you walk in.”
Before she died, Danielle left Amy and her two older brothers memory boxes containing messages and gifts for milestones she knew she might not live to see, such as L plates for when they passed their driving tests and letters for birthdays and graduations.
Amy still has some of those envelopes unopened, waiting for major moments in her life, and she said these mementos are “really special”.
“It’s incredible. There was even a key when I turned 18, and it says, ‘The key to adulthood’,” Amy said.
With her family history, Amy has already had consultations with doctors about her risk of breast cancer and will begin mammograms at just 25 years old – and according to the NHS, NHS breast screening is offered to women from the age of 50.
While Amy has her own life plans and is currently travelling the world, she said she will always be involved in the charity and wants to help others as much as she can.
She said Future Dreams has gone from “strength to strength” and she hopes this continues.
“I lost my mum at six, I grew up without her, and breast cancer literally took her away from me,” Amy said.
“With grief, you realise it’s going to be there forever, but you just become better at handling it.”
Speaking about how Danielle and Sylvie would feel about the charity now, Amy added: “I want to say they wouldn’t believe it, but then part of me thinks maybe they would because they were so strong-minded and they believed in themselves so much.
“I think they would just be so amazed that it’s still going and it has built its own momentum. Everyone has respected their legacy.”
To find out more about Future Dreams, visit: futuredreams.org.uk.