'He was very kindhearted, a lovely son, a really beautiful fella'

To his family, the late Darren Coyle will always be ‘Our Darren’.

Darren was the much loved son of Teresa and Tommy; loving brother of Frank, Aiden, Stacey and Tomás, and brother-in-law of Tara, Mandy, Darryl and Ciara. He was a caring uncle to Dylan, Felix, Max, Laurie, Alfie, Grace, and Anya - in New Zealand. 

Speaking to The Derry News, Darren’s mother, Teresa, described him as “kind and loving”.

“Darren loved everyone and was loved by everyone,” she said. 

“Darren died on June 30, and our hearts are broken and our lives are changed forever,” added Teresa.

“I am not shy to tell people Darren took his own life because he had suffered with mental health problems for quite a long time. 

“The past 13 weeks have been very sad and painful for all of us. It seems like a blur that somehow just should not have happened, and, at the same time, like a never ending nightmare. We just wish Darren was still here with us.

“He was very kindhearted, a lovely son, a really beautiful fella. Darren was very thoughtful in everything he did, in all of his relationships. He always only wanted to make people happy. Unfortunately Darren could not find that happiness for himself. 

“We got some solace during Darrren’s wake and funeral from the hundreds of people who attended. During those days, people spoke to us about Darren being a gentle person, a gentleman, kindhearted and thoughtful, someone who offered so much to everyone,” said Teresa. “He would have done anything for anybody. He would have gone out of his way to buy really meaningful gifts,” she remembered.

Darren fundraising for the Foyle Hospice.

“Darren was so good to his nieces and nephews,” smiled Teresa. “He always did the school runs. He loved his car. If we needed a lift, he was there. 

“With the wanes, he was nearly like an early years specialist because he knew how to work with children and play with children. He drew with them. He got right down to their level. We all went on holidays together at Easter and he took them to the beach, paddled in the water and made wee sailing boats. Stacey’s wanes adored him. Darren was knowledgeable and well read, he just lacked self-belief.

“Sadly, a few weeks before he died, Darren talked to me on the phone for hours saying he just felt so lonely and so lost and so sad. Because of his mental health struggles, he felt he had nobody and nothing while everybody else had something. 

“Tomás wanted me to mention that recently Darren had got involved with the Action Mental Health New Horizons: Foyle, in Pump Street. He was doing painting there and enjoyed it. 

“He also had a wee dog, Jax, who he called his ‘Wee Buddy’. Darren loved dogs. He had always wanted a Lakeland Terrier because he remembered from his childhood days our neighbours in Melmore Gardens, the McNulty family, had Lakeland Terriers. He and I got Jax about four years ago. We will now look after and cherish Jax as Darren did and will forever see the goodness of Darren in him,” said Teresa, who had nothing but praise for all of  the emergency services who supported them on June 30 - the paramedics and the two PSNI officers especially.

“I would like to thank them for their compassion and empathy on that painful day,” added Teresa, who said she was also grateful for the ongoing support of the Western Trust’s Suicide Liasion Officer.

“And I have to mention our family friends neighbours, old and new, who have been so generous and kind over the past few months, with gifts, flowers and their time,” she said. 

Darren’s sister, Stacey, said all the men in the family took part in Sunday’s Foyle Hospice Male Walk / Run.

Darren Coyle's family taking part in Sunday's Foyle Hospice Male Walk / Run.

“Darren had taken part in the Walk  / Run in the past and had planned to do it this year also, so because it was coming up, we decided to all get together on Sunday in his memory. 16 of the men from our family - brothers, brothers-in-law, nephews and cousins - did the walk, cheered on from the sidelines from the rest of the family. 

“We just want to remember and honour ‘Our Darren’ by getting together, for a good cause. We are trying to hold on to the good stuff.”

If you have been affected by anything in this piece, The Samaritans are here - day or night, 365 days a year. You can call them for free on 116 123, email them at: jo@samaritans.org  or visit www.samaritans.org  to find your nearest branch.