Father who had ‘ordeal’ in youth with undiagnosed ADHD launches campaign tour to show young people ‘they are not alone’

A father who said his youth was an “ordeal” after he lived with undiagnosed ADHD has launched a campaign and tour about the condition to show young people “they are not alone”.

As a child, Ryan Swain, 35, said he could “never sit still” at school and he would “blurt out answers before the teacher finished”, often getting in trouble for his behaviour.

The professional DJ and entertainer based in Malton, North Yorkshire, who described his brain as a firework display “but you’re the one holding all the rockets”, said he struggled in mainstream education until he was eventually excluded at the age of 15.

While he transitioned on to an alternative education programme, teaching core subjects alongside life skills, Ryan still grappled with his undiagnosed ADHD and he became “overwhelmed” by its symptoms – prompting him to seek help via the NHS.

Ryan, who welcomed a baby, Zayn, in April this year with his fiancee, Sam Cook, 40, was diagnosed with ADHD at the age of 20 and he has since learned to manage his condition with balance, structure and routine.

Following his challenges, Ryan has launched his own campaign and voluntary tour this October to mark ADHD Awareness Month, where he is holding talks in schools and colleges to “break down the stigma” around the condition and “strike a chord” with a younger audience.

“I had an awful ordeal with ADHD through school, through childhood, through adolescence,” Ryan told PA Real Life.

“These conditions, if they’re not harnessed or understood correctly, they can go on and have a massive, profound impact on your life as you get older.

“That’s why I’m doing this, to make young people aware, to make teachers aware, to make parents aware that these conditions need to be treated and handled properly.

“I want people, especially young people, to know that they are not alone.”

According to the NHS, ADHD (attention deficit hyperactivity disorder) is a condition where the brain works differently to most people.

Symptoms of ADHD involve a person’s ability to pay attention to things, having high energy levels and their ability to control impulses, the NHS says.

At school, Ryan said he was a child who could “never sit still”, he would “blurt out answers before the teacher finished”, and he “always forgot” his homework or PE kit.

“I would lose pens, books, items of clothing – basically anything that wasn’t attached to me,” he said.

“I never had any malice or bad intentions, my brain just worked differently and I acted on impulse.

“Imagine your brain is a firework display but you’re the one holding all the rockets, everything is just blowing up inside your head.”

Ryan said he struggled in particular when he was asked to sit or stand still.

“It would automatically set me up for failure because no matter how hard I tried, my brain tells me to do something different than what my body wants to do,” he said.

By the age of 15, Ryan said his thoughts became “darker and deeper”, especially while going through puberty, and he said he was eventually excluded from school due to his behaviour.

Ryan was then placed on to an alternative education programme, which provided him with tailored teaching alongside life skills.

“I still got to do my core subjects but it was broken down,” Ryan explained.

“They also taught key life skills, so paying bills, cooking, cleaning, personal hygiene, social skills – basically how to take care of yourself.

“It was a wonderful thing and it changed my life.”

Ryan ended up achieving C grades and above in his GCSEs – but by the age of 19, he said his undiagnosed ADHD was starting to cause him “a lot of strife and chaos”.

“I started to feel other, darker feelings and emotions, like depression and anxiety, and I was constantly overwhelmed by my forgetfulness,” he said.

After seeking help through the NHS, Ryan was informed he met the criteria for ADHD, and he was officially diagnosed at the age of 20.

Ryan credits his parents, Paul and Debbie Swain, 60 and 63 respectively, for recognising his struggles throughout his youth.

“They were very accepting and very open-minded, and they knew something wasn’t quite right with me from early on,” he said.

“However, not everybody has a support network, not everybody has a loving family or a close friend they can open up to.”

Now, Ryan has learned to manage his ADHD through balance, structure and routine.

Following his lived experience, Ryan has launched his own campaign and voluntary tour, titled You, Me & ADHD, to mark ADHD Awareness Month this October.

Throughout the month, he has travelled to schools, colleges and community groups across the North East of England to hold talks with young people and faculty to raise awareness of ADHD and neurodiversity.

“What I’m trying to do with these talks is break down the stigma, the mindset and the judgment around these conditions,” he said.

“I think people often refer to ADHD as bad or negative, but in reality, we’re just wired up a little bit different.

“We need to be understood for our strengths and our weaknesses – and when you have these understandings in place, it gets easier to manage.”

During the sessions, Ryan said he shares his personal journey with ADHD and the practical life hacks he has gained along the way.

He shares advice around time management, organisation and mindfulness, as well as tips for social settings, such as maintaining eye contact and allowing someone to finish their sentence.

He also highlights the importance of writing a short list of five tasks to complete within a day.

“I still do this now, and it doesn’t have to be changing the world,” he said, adding he tells students it could be completing homework or running a bath.

“If I complete my five things, if I tick them all off and don’t get distracted, that’s an achievement.”

Ryan said he now receives messages from parents and teachers to ask for further advice to support children and young people with ADHD.

“If I can go into a room and strike a chord with just one person, then my job is done,” he said.

Ryan now hopes to make You, Me & ADHD a national campaign which he revisits every year during ADHD Awareness Month.

For others struggling with ADHD, neurodiversity or mental health challenges, Ryan said “acceptance is the key”.

“It’s always starts with you and there’s nothing braver, I don’t think personally, than waking up every day, battling your own mind and still showing up,” he said.

To find out more about Ryan’s campaign, follow @officialryanswain on Instagram.