1. Join the Irish army, you'll get lots of free stuff
2. Any spare teeth in your house?
3. If it's good enough for the Czar of Russia's sprog......

1.
5. There's nothing worse than a cow going wrong.....

2.
Ah yes, we've all heard farmers diagnosing a problem as a "cow going wrong".... It's ok though, apparently a dose of VAP will fix that right up. Who needs qualified vets when you can dose an animal with something containing hard paraffin? (Leitrim Observer, February 1963)

