Always keep ’em laughing

Always keep ’em laughing

C’mere ‘til I tell ya

Daniel Carey

I LAUGHED when I learned that Christine Hamilton, the wife of former Conservative Party minister Neil Hamilton, had changed her name by deed poll to ‘Mrs British Battleaxe’. So it was disappointing to learn that this was done as a stunt to promote the Legal Deed Service website, rather than to fulfill some long-standing wish on Mrs Hamilton’s part. She published a Bumper Book of British Battleaxes in 1997, so the new moniker was, apparently, an obvious choice.

Given her high profile and her appearance on ‘I’m A Celebrity, Get Me Out Of Here’, I was already familiar with Mrs Hamilton/Battleaxe. But sometimes you only discover what a person has done in life when they shuffle off this mortal coil. Certainly, it wasn’t until I read a recent obituary that I knew anything about another person with two names.

Lux Interior, who was born Erick Lee Purkhiser, was lead singer of horror punk band the Cramps, whose work included ‘I Was a Teenage Werewolf’ and ‘Bikini Girls With Machine Guns’. They made a notorious appearance at a California mental institution in 1978, echoing Johnny Cash’s famous concert in Folsom Prison.

Interior, whose stage presence was described in one obit as ‘part zombie, part Elvis Presley’, was widely reported to have died from a heroin overdose in 1987. The rumours were untrue, so he had the rare privilege of reading tributes to himself while he was still alive. “No such luck this time,” the Daily Telegraph noted.

Most obituaries are solemn affairs, but when Ruth E Rencevicz passed away in September 2008, the first line of the notice said that her death was ‘due to complications resulting from her children making her old before her time’. Warning that the obituary was written with Ruth’s ‘playful and irreverent outlook’ in mind, it went on to list the surviving members of her family, including ‘an illegitimate child conceived when the circus was in town named Greg ‘The Donkey’ King’.

“Over the years,” the obituary continued, “in addition to her regular jobs as a full-time mom and switchboard operator ... Ruth also served her country as a covert spy for the Central Intelligence Agency, where during the Cold War she was largely responsible for the break-up of the Soviet Union near the end of the 20th century. At least, that’s the way she told it.

“Ruth was also very active as a volunteer with youth in her community in Tallmadge, Ohio, where she was known to selflessly give of her time by standing on her balcony yelling at kids for ‘playing that rap music’ at all hours of the day and night. She also served as a mentor to young people by throwing rocks at teenagers dressed in loose baggy pants ... She winged a couple of ’em pretty good, from what we understand.

“Ruth was adamant that people use the occasion of her passing to remember and celebrate her life. In lieu of formal funeral proceedings or viewing hours, she requested that those who remember and cared about her share both a special memory and a drink in her honour. Preferably Bud Light Lime, or if that’s not available, gasoline or floor wax.”

If the 81-year-old was even half as funny as her obituary, she must have made a lot of people laugh.