Jimmy Varley

A tribute

Now I recall my friend because he lived according to his code, and in his way was true to God. Courage he had and was content to be himself, whatever came his way. There is no other chivalry.

– ‘A Man I knew’, by Brendan Kennelly

It was with the most profound regret and sadness that the people of Robeen learned on May 26 of the untimely passing of our dear friend and neighbour, Jimmy Varley of Bloomfield. For some time we knew that the hinges of health were squeaking ever more loudly as Jimmy battled with quiet grace, courage and the utmost dignity to return to full health. Yet, we never contemplated his passing, afraid to imagine life without one universally respected by all those who knew him.

When the sad news reached us, we were devastated, our great sense of loss generated by the fact that an ordinary, yet truly extraordinary gentleman had left our midst. For 52 years Jimmy, in his quiet, gentle, unassuming way, carved his noble impression on life, earning in the process, the complete love and respect of his family, friends, work colleagues and neighbours.

This was most evidently reflected in the huge numbers of people who attended his wake and funeral Mass. The latter was an extremely moving tribute to one who probably never knew how much he meant to so many. No doubt, given his quiet unselfish and shy disposition, he would have been embarrassed with all the fuss and attention. Yet, he would never deny those who mourned so grievously, the comfort which all felt from the words of his close friend, school pal and comrade of many years, Fr Tommie Commons, who was chief celebrant of his funeral Mass.

Two hours passed like ten minutes as all those involved in a poignant and beautiful service tried valiantly and with great reverence to pay adequate respect to a gentle man of the greatest honour and integrity.

With most gracious eloquence, Jimmy’s younger brother, Jarlath, described the journey home, which Jimmy had taken as he breathed the last shallow and peaceful breaths of his earthly life. A journey back to that which meant everything to him, Robeen, the old family homestead and farm, which he called his office on the hill, his family, friends and neighbours.

His sister, Mary, expressed perfectly what it was that made Jimmy so special by recounting his unselfish words of resignation to his mother when his illness was first diagnosed. “Thank God it’s me and not one of those with responsibilities.” The deep sadness of all of Jimmy’s nieces and nephews expressed in a way that no words could possibly do, what exactly he meant to all of them. We could take comfort only from the fact that now, Jimmy was at last back home where he most wanted to be, that his suffering was all over and that he had crossed the great divide to his eternal reward.

We tried to combat our grief by way of recounting the endless stories and regaling all the joyful memories, which Jimmy left with us over the years. Tears and laughter mingled as Jimmy’s unique and totally inoffensive sense of wit and wisdom was reincarnated until dawn thinned out the holy candlelight around the front room of the beautiful home that he so yearned for in his final days of illness.

Like Father Tommie Commons, I had the great pleasure of knowing Jimmy for a very long time, all of my life in fact. I was fortunate enough to count him as a close friend and work colleague for 30 years. Like all who knew Jimmy, I am sorely saddened by his loss.

Over the years, Jimmy’s sense of humour, wry observations and unique turn of phrase were what endeared him immediately to all those who came into contact with him. In his presence you were always guaranteed a laugh and quite often, a well-considered and alternative view.

It was these qualities, coupled with countless others which made Jimmy such an invaluable and unforgettable, friend, work colleague and member of his community.

Scratch a little deeper with Jimmy and you found a man of great wisdom and of keen intellect, a more contemplative and complex being who was fashioned from the foundations of his faith. Our great Christian beliefs of Faith, Hope and Charity formed the backing track of Jimmy’s life, which was alas, all too short.

Jimmy’s faith in his family, friends and those who looked after him so wonderfully well during his long illness was always very evident and palpable. His faith in his saviour was no less steadfast, but more private to him. Hope was Jimmy’s weapon as he battled so bravely with every fibre of his being to overcome his serious, prolonged and final illness.

His unbounded charity manifested itself in his kind, thoughtful and caring nature. These qualities coupled with his tranquillity and generosity of spirit were what made him such a special and cherished son, brother, uncle, friend, neighbour and work colleague.

Jimmy’s quirky humour, keen judgement and sense of right and wrong made him a blessing in everybody’s day and life. However, of his many outstanding qualities, I would say it was his loyalty that set him apart. Loyalty to his family, his own place, his neighbours and colleagues, loyalty to all the things in life that he held dear, which included cards, horse racing and, not to mention, politics! Whatever the situation, you just knew that, Jimmy would stand by your side to offer his support and wise counsel.

The more you needed him, the more sure you were of his gentle, dignified, gracious and unobtrusive presence. If the enemy surrounded me and I was facing my darkest hour, Jimmy is one of few I would want by my side, because he would never leave you or never give up. (It is quite likely also that he would broker some kind of peace deal with the opposition before the worst came to the worst!).

It would be wrong if we were not to remember and celebrate Jimmy for all of the happiness and joy, which he brought to our lives, because, above all else Jimmy was a man of most joyful and jovial disposition, who recognised and embodied all the important things in life. There is no doubt that we will miss that great sense of comradeship, fun and fulfilment, which Jimmy brought to all of us.

However, we must be grateful that he blessed our lives by passing this way. He enriched us all and was, I think, particularly inspiring in the manner in which he confronted and dealt with his long and final illness. It is little wonder that his medical team in Saint James’s Hospital, Dublin, fell strangely quiet on learning of his passing. They too had come to admire and respect a unique spirit.

As much as Jimmy was a blessing, he was truly blessed also with an outstanding family. The love and respect in which he was held by all of them was very evident in the manner in which they all cared for him during his protracted illness. To Jimmy’s loving mother, Evelyn, to his brothers, Tony, Jarlath and Joseph and to his sisters, Mary, Anne, Mairéad, and Joyce, we tender our heartfelt sympathy.

How comforting were the words of his brother Jarlath when he said: “He is not gone too far you know. I see him in the fields of Mayo, in a meadow or a bog. Leaning on a gate, talking with friends, smiling shyly, understanding life.”

Thank you Jimmy for all that you taught us. May God rest your gentle, gentle soul.

– Pat Mc Govern.