Burlesque and lap dance teacher for mid-life women says her oldest student is 72: ‘It’s silly, naughty and liberating’

A 51-year-old burlesque instructor who teaches bespoke classes for middle-aged women has said that while “sometimes we’re twirling tassels, lap dancing”, the sisterhood and confidence built in classes helps often-”invisible” women rediscover parts of themselves that “they have forgotten, or that they think is too late to see again”.

Dr Audrey Tang, a psychologist and leadership trainer who lives in Milton Keynes, Buckinghamshire, trained as a burlesque instructor in May 2023, having always loved to dance and to be involved in community theatre. However, as she worked on her PhD focusing on the strain of emotional labour both in the workplace and in the home, she wondered how burlesque could help people “grow from the opportunity to express” themselves.

In summer 2023, she launched her local burlesque class which is aimed at women over 30 – though men are welcome too – a demographic for which she said “it’s very easy to become invisible” as the pressure mounts from caring responsibilities for children or elderly parents, running a household, and progressing their careers. Her oldest student currently is 72.

“Between the ages of especially 30 to 50, I think other concerns begin to take over not just a woman’s life, but her whole identity,” Audrey told PA Real Life.

“That’s why this is so powerful, to remind you that you are not just your label.”

While burlesque is commonly associated with saucy stripteases, Audrey said that it is more about  storytelling through dance – though often with a healthy dose of naughtiness thrown in. It can be physically demanding, and requires learning movements and routines, making it beneficial physically, cognitively and psychologically.

“Burlesque is like no other class… If you’ve got a body, you’re welcome,” said Audrey, who added that she has watched her students’ confidence blossom over the course of her sessions.

In Audrey’s classes, each week brings a new routine to learn, giving her students flexibility and easing the worry of missing out if life gets in the way of attending a session.

There is no need to dress up, she said, with most of the ladies starting out in leggings and a T-shirt – but as their confidence grows, many turn to fishnets, lingerie and fancy costumes that embody the characters they are portraying that week.

“Because certain pieces of music are character-based, I will always suggest, if you want to bring (a special costume), you can,” she said.

“Some of the ladies now, they look sensational… But they will say, ‘Oh, I was told this was too young for me, or it was too much for me’.

“This is the space where they know it’s about them, and about them feeling great, and I think the creation of a space like that is very unusual.”

Audrey’s classes involve “all kinds of different characters, identities, footwork, and choreography” – some of which are slower, more serious stories, and others which are dramatic and sexy.

“Sometimes we’re twirling tassels, and those tassels are always sewn on top of vests… I’ve done lap dancing, where I’ve got everyone to bring teddy bears in, they’re the clients,” Audrey laughed.

“What I hope I’m doing is creating a space where people are playing and experimenting with all kinds of different characters, identities, footwork, and choreography – things that they’ve not done ever – and it might unlock something in them that they never knew they had,” she added.

“We are playing. We’re playing these characters, but you come away from it thinking ‘I enjoyed playing the femme fatale’, or ‘I enjoyed playing the subservient character’. It allows you to think about that information as well, and go ‘Oh, why did I enjoy that so much?’.”

For the demographic of students that Audrey teaches, women who range in age from 30 to over 70, this self-reflection is particularly important as, she said, from mid-life “it’s very easy (for women) to become invisible”.

Whether they are caring for children or elderly parents, juggling running a household with furthering their career, or simply feeling resigned to a label of ‘mum’, ‘wife’ or ‘grandma’ without being able to explore the person that lies beneath it, Audrey believes that burlesque gives women a chance to play, to be chaotic, to be sexy, dramatic and naughty.

“Coming to classes is quite liberating for people,” she said.

“They can give over the power and control and just enjoy the class. They can make mistakes, and that’s OK, because those mistakes are received absolutely authentically with good humour – we all have a giggle about it.

“It doesn’t need to be perfect anyway, because we all know that actually showing up is the hardest part, because life gets in the way.

“You’re maybe used to always being the strong one, always being the problem solver, always being the person in control, and you’re allowed to leave that at the door.

“If you want to be a bit silly, or you want to have a laugh, be the naughty one at the back of the class, you can do that, and it’s fun, and it’s enjoyable.”

Audrey’s burlesque students have even taken to the stage at community events as their confidence in themselves, their bodies and their abilities have grown, and she hopes that by encouraging women to love themselves and their bodies, they will inspire the next generation of girls as positive role models.

“A child doesn’t sit there and look at their body and criticise it, but you see mum doing it,” she reflected.

“It’s this whole thing about how we need to play more, we need to love ourselves more – we need to be overt with that self nurture, because otherwise what we’re role modelling to the next generation… is not going to be as healthy as we’d like it to be.”

Above all, Audrey said that her mission – and that of burlesque instructors across the world – is to “find that part of every person that comes into class, that that person thinks is lost and is hidden or repressed”.

“We will find it, we will bring it out, and we will put tassels on it.”