‘I was groomed at nine by taxi driver who drove me home from school, sexually abused me and made me watch pornography’
Chloe May said the man took her ‘childhood and innocence’ away.
A woman whose taxi driver sexually abused her from the age of nine, grooming her over time, showing her home-made pornography and touching her “private areas”, wants to reduce “the stigma and shame” around sexual abuse.
Chloe May, 37, from Surrey, who has waived her right to anonymity but prefers to use her first and middle names, said Andrew David Starenczak, 63, of Chertsey in Surrey, regularly drove her home from school from the age of nine.
Chloe, a content creator and founder of the podcast, The B Brave Project, said he then started asking her to “breathe into his ear”, kiss him on the cheek, hold his hand and touch him sexually.
Chloe said Starenczak, who she called Andy, escalated the abuse to the point he would “expose himself” to her, including routinely taking her to an “isolated car park” where he would make her “change in the car” and she would “sometimes be completely naked”.
On one occasion, Chloe remembered he “took it too far”, to the point where he caused vaginal bleeding, so she hid her underwear under her bed when she got home.
She said he “took (her) childhood and innocence away from (her)” and the abuse continued for three years, until Chloe’s mother started being able to take her to school aged 12.
It was not until Chloe was 28 in 2017 that she felt comfortable disclosing the abuse to the police, before Starenczak was convicted of six counts of indecent assault, for which he received a nine-year prison sentence with a one-year extended licence period.
He was found not guilty by the jury on the judge’s direction for one count of indecency with a child, with two other counts of indecency with a child to lie on file.
He was sentenced on December 17 2019, and he was also handed a restraining order until further order and a Sexual Harm Prevention Order for a period of 15 years.
Chloe told PA Real Life: “Sexual abuse or any kind of child abuse, it ripples into everything.
“Healing isn’t linear… but the good days are bigger than the bad days now.
“It’s taken me a long time to get here, and I will be on this journey till the day I die… but I’m turning it into a positive.”
Before the abuse, Chloe said she felt lucky to have a “very privileged upbringing” and her childhood was “joyful and happy”.
She said she “struggled academically” before she got a diagnosis of “severe dyslexia”, so she ended up going to a different Send private school than her two younger sisters.
As a result, Chloe’s new school was around 45 minutes away from her house, so the family booked a taxi to drop her home from school.
This is how Chloe came to meet Starenczak, who she said “started to groom” her by telling her “rude jokes” and swearing a lot.
Chloe said: “As a nine-year-old, that was really exciting because I had this older chap talking to me like an adult.
“I thought we had this friendship.”
Chloe said this progressed to Starenczak telling her about sex, including “what he would do with his partner in bed”.
Alongside this, Chloe said Starenczak would have “chocolate bars and fizzy drinks” waiting for her in the car or he would give her money to run into a shop to buy her own sweets.
She said: “He would then start asking me to breathe in his ear, kiss him on the cheek and hold his hand. It was a very gradual thing.”
After 18 months at her Send school, it was decided that Chloe would go to a performing arts school that was “even further away”, so Starenczak began picking her up in the morning and afternoons, as well as taking her to dancing class.
Things escalated when Chloe described Starenczak showing her pornography on his camcorder.
She said: “He made me watch this quite a few times over the coming weeks.
“One time, I realised that it was actually him and his partner having sex.
“Another distinct memory I have is when I was watching it… he touched my leg.”
From then, Chloe said the abuse became increasingly physical to touching her private areas and genitals, before he asked her to “touch him” – although Chloe said it was “never a really forceful act”.
Chloe said Starenczak then began driving her to “secluded” car parks to expose himself and continue the sexual abuse.
She said: “I remember this one time, he took it too far and it really, really hurt.
“I was bleeding and I went home and put my knickers under the bed so my mum couldn’t see.”
By the time Chloe was 12 in the summer of 2001, her sisters began catching a bus to school so Chloe’s mum could take her to and from school, meaning the abuse stopped.
In the immediate aftermath of the abuse, Chloe said she did not feel comfortable to disclose it to anyone until she told one of her sisters at 15, then a friend at 18, who both encouraged her to report the abuse to the police.
When Chloe was 28 in March 2017, she said conversations around sexual abuse surrounding Jimmy Savile and Rolf Harris got “too much” for her, so she spoke to her mum – who she had previously disclosed the abuse to in 2014 – and was encouraged to call children’s charity the NSPCC.
Chloe said: “I spoke to someone for about an hour and he was amazing.
“He made me feel believed and that my story was worthy.”
Chloe described what happened next, adding: “I put down the phone and I think it was probably adrenaline, but I called the police on 101.
“Within about half an hour, I had two police officers around my house taking my statement.”
After an investigation, the case went to trial in December 2019 and evidence was heard from Chloe’s sister, friend, parents and herself.
Chloe said: “It was horrific and retraumatising… I broke down and I had to actually run out of the court.”
On December 13 2019, Chloe said she got a call from the detective on the case to say that Starenczak had been found guilty.
Chloe said: “My knees buckled and I fell to the floor. I just burst into tears.”
He was sentenced on December 17 2019.
In the aftermath of the abuse, Chloe said she has had numerous talking therapies and cognitive behavioural therapy to help manage symptoms of “crippling” anxiety, depression, psychosis and mood swings, as well as being “back and forth” on anti-depressants.
She worked for the NSPCC as part of the lived experience team for two years from September 2023, before she left to start a podcast called The B Brave Project, where she shares the stories of survivors of sexual abuse.
She said: “It has been a big part of my healing, knowing that I’m helping others.
“This is my calling and it is what I’m meant to be doing.
“So when I look back and I think about the person that I was back in 2017… I never knew who I was.
“But I do now. I know who Chloe is, and it’s incredibly empowering and uplifting.”
For more information about The B Brave Project podcast, visit Chloe’s Instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/chloe_speaks_out/.
To find out more about the NSPCC, visit its website here: https://secure.nspcc.org.uk/.